One of my favorite stories is about the time I went to a pizza restaurant and a 50-ish lady in line in front of me was ordering a mushroom and meat pizza. The 16-year-old behind the counter asked her what kind of meat did she want on her pizza? The lady got a puzzled look on her face and said that she couldn't remember what they were called but said that they were round and spicy.

You mean pepperoni?, the suddenly sarcastic teenager quipped.

The lady, now red-faced, said "yes, that's it.....I want a mushroom and pepperoni pizza!"

I must admit that I silently chuckled to myself and then went back to the office and shared the story about Pepperoni Lady with everyone there, as well. Who on earth forgets what pepperoni is?

Of course, that was before I knew anything about fluctating hormone levels and the major changes a woman goes through in the midlife of her life. Since turning 50 this past November I now know that I have much more in common with the pepperoni lady than I ever imagined.

I know what's going on. My hormone levels, which have kept me on an even keel all my life, are now fluctuating madly like today's stock market. And we all now how ugly that is.

In the past few weeks I have lost 1 slipper, 1 important tax form, and a new black suede jacket with fur cuffs and collar. Poof! Gone. Absolutely NO idea where any of this stuff could be. On the other hand, I have found a box of Cheerios in the fridge and a half gallon of 1% milk.....in the freezer.

Yes, I know, it's funny. Really, I try to have a good sense of humor about these things. What other option do I have?

I know that my hormone levels are low and then too high and then non-existent....sometimes all 3 on the same day. And, it's driving me crazy!

Oprah has the answers to female hormonal problems, of course, because she knows The Secret, for goodness sake, and perky Suzanne Somers has the answers because she invented the thigh master and you know once you invent something like that you become an expert on everything. Dr Phil's wife, Robin, has the answers because she's married to Dr. Phil who is famous because he knows Oprah and everyone is living la vida loca with their cures for the menopausal woman.

Except me. Does anyone else besides me find it crazy getting health advice from celebrities?

Meanwhile, I will continue to embrace these changes in life with a sense of humor, the support of my friends and the love from my long-suffering husband.

Stay tuned, hang on and brace yourselves.....this could get interesting!